Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Protecting the Innocent

My bus pulls up to a regular stop on its route today, comes to a complete stop, and opens its doors to waiting victims of the bus. There's a man standing at the edge of the sidewalk looking like he wants to board, but when the doors open he stands in place, unmoving. So, bus driver closes door and slowly pulls away. Okay, lemme tangent real quick -- if you are waiting at a bus stop alone, the next bus that comes by, regardless of whether it's the one you want or not, is going to STOP for you because the bus driver doesn't know better. Bus drivers cannot read minds! If it is NOT the bus you need, please don't wait for the driver to pull out of traffic, stop and open its doors before you say, "No thanks." Because our big hunk of slow-moving metal now has to wait for ten cars to go by before merging back in traffic and it'll take the next five minutes to accelerate back up to speed before stopping for the next idiot who doesn't wave our bus along. WAVE the bus to go by, or shake your head noticeably. These are the appropriate forms of denying a ride on the bus if you are alone at a bus stop. We who are suffering on that bus that smells like feet don't care for the additional three minutes wasted just to get a close-up of your face, thankyouverymuch. Back to the story: Bus driver begins to pull away and I'm annoyed for reasons just explained, then suddenly it's like the man on the sidewalk snaps into consciousness and he runs after the bus, waving his hand frantically, so bus driver pulls over again. Guy gets on in a huge huff and yells, "I guess you gotta be real fast around here!" I'm thinking: Or just sober. Then he calls the bus driver an idiot, mumbles a few things and gets off the bus two stops later, but not without threatening to report the driver first. I roll my eyes, not too worried this guy even has access to a phone or Internet. But as I depart, I tell the bus driver I saw the whole thing and I would defend him if the guy complains. It's good to have friends on the inside.

1 comment:

Hillary said...

Anyone causing a bus ride to be longer than absolutely necessary should be hexed.